‘The Farewell’: The lovely story of a family like everybody’s

Comic actor Awkwafina gets serious, successfully, as an American joining relatives in China to send off her beloved grandmother.

SHARE ‘The Farewell’: The lovely story of a family like everybody’s
Selects_71.jpg

Billi (Awkwafina, right) knows her beloved grandmother (Zhao Shuzhen) is dying but the grandma doesn’t in “The Farewell.”

A24

Oh, this family.

What a bunch.

We love this family. We laugh with this family. We weep with this family.

We recognize aspects of our own clan within the complicated, maddening, frustrating, head-butting, ridiculous, hilarious, terrible, wonderful, but most of all deeply loving dynamic of the extended family depicted in writer-director Lulu Wang’s semi-autobiographical, absolutely beautiful and memorably lovely “The Farewell.”

‘The Farewell’

‘The Farewell’

A24 presents a film written and directed by Lulu Wang. Rated PG (for thematic material, brief language and some smoking). Running time: 98 minutes. Opens Thursday at local theaters.

This is a viewing experience to be treasured. It is one of the very best films of 2019.

Though set (and filmed) mostly in Changchun, China, steeped in Chinese culture and traditions and filled with scenes featuring specific turns of phrase and small touches sure to be unfamiliar to the average American viewer (for example, me), “The Farewell” is likely to have you identifying with at least one of the major characters and nodding in recognition at many a scene and turn of plot, regardless of your background.

From the smart but underachieving adult daughter who is still treated like a teenager by her impossible-to-please mother; to the goofy cousin who doesn’t say much, most likely because he doesn’t have much to say, to the beloved grandmother who is the undisputed boss of the family and speaks her mind at the dinner table without even the hint of a filter …

Many a viewer is likely to think: Been there, lived that.

For all those universal elements, “The Farewell” is at its most charming and special in the Chinese-specific moments large and small, e.g., a discussion about the colloquialism mei nu, or “beautiful woman,” to describe all women, and the scene when the family visits the grave of a departed loved one, armed with many of the things he enjoyed in life, and they get into a heated discussion about whether or not to give him a cigarette, even though he’s, well, dead.

“The Farewell” is “based on an actual lie,” as we’re told at the outset.

In 2013, Wang’s Nai Nai (paternal grandmother) was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer — but the family agreed not to tell her, because they believed THEY should take on the burden of knowing she would soon die.

The actor-rapper Awkwafina, who owned every moment she was onscreen as the comic relief sidekick in “Crazy Rich Asians,” is the fictional doppelganger for Wang: the Chinese-born, raised in America, 30ish Billi, who has remained close with her Nai Nai (Zhao Shuzhen) through constant phone conversations.

Billi is devastated by the news about Nai Nai, and vehemently disagrees with the family’s decision not to tell Nai Nai about her condition — but her parents and other older relatives explain this decision is in keeping with traditional Chinese beliefs about family members taking on the heaviest of emotional burdens.

This is one of many instances where Billi finds herself adrift between two worlds — a feeling exacerbated when she joins the extended family in China for her cousin’s hastily arranged wedding to his Japanese girlfriend, which is really just an excuse for everyone to get together to say goodbye to the unsuspecting Nai Nai.

Billi resents her parents for moving to America when she was a little girl, taking her away from her adored Nai Nai and plunging her into a strange and overwhelming new world. But now that Billi’s back, she feels like a stranger in her homeland — apologizing every time she speaks because her Chinese isn’t good, constantly at odds with her mother, struggling with all her resolve not to break down in front of Nai Nai.

Lots of heavy stuff, to be sure, and there are times when “The Farewell” delivers powerful emotional blows, and we ache for Billi and what she’s going through — in large part because Awkwafina’s performance is so raw and authentic and in the moment.

But “The Farewell” is also filled with sharply observed serio-comic touches. The wedding banquet features a steady parade of family members delivering terrible speeches, putting on awful musical performances, getting seriously drunk and/or breaking into crying jags. Even what is arguably the most intense scene in the movie feels just slightly absurd, because there are a couple of people in the room who shouldn’t be there but have no idea how to exit gracefully — so they just stand there, still as statues.

Awkwafina has that instantly identifiable rasp that makes her sound as if she spent last night cheering her lungs out at a concert. (I love her voice.) She has a unique way of delivering lines, and an onscreen persona that pops whether she’s in a feature film or doing a TV commercial.

One could see how there could be a little bit of a risk in casting someone with such natural, fireworks-level star power as the lead in a poignant, smaller film such as this — especially because most of the broader, wackier moments are assigned to other characters. (Billi is essentially a background player in the aforementioned instant classic of a scene at the grave site.)

From the moment Awkwafina-as-Billi appears onscreen, that’s never a concern. She disappears into the character and delivers one of the most effective, endearing and impactful performances of the year.

The Latest
Asked how they would bring together a divided city, Vallas said his “comprehensive, very strong, very cohesive and united coalition” would allow him to do so. Johnson said he wouldn’t have gotten this far without a “multi-cultural, multi-generational movement” that is “Black, Brown, white, Asian, young old, middle-class and working class.”
Michael Barr, the nation’s top banking regulator, said Silicon Valley Bank was warned in the fall of 2021 that its interest rate model was not ‘aligned with reality.’
He seems content to hand control over football operations and the Arlington Park stadium project to incoming president Kevin Warren. And as far as the likelihood of the Bears leaving Chicago, he says, “Change is necessary at times.”
Only 3% of ballots cast on Feb. 28 came from youth voters. So what’s the deal? “It’s obvious to me that young people in that city don’t feel empowered by their governance,” said Della Volpe, author of “Fight: How Gen Z is Channeling Their Fear and Passion to Save America.”
The Bears closed on the 326-acre former Arlington International Racecourse property last month and will decide in the coming months whether to pursue building stadium — in addition to hotels, shops and restaurants — on the property.